"Afraid" by Ekuna Ch

I am afraid to pray, Thinking God will Continue punishing me, Out of love, To teach me a lesson.

I am afraid to hope, As always, Hopes will turn into Delusions.

I am afraid to feel, I felt too much pain And disappointment.

I choose to be effortless, Over being incapable. Every step I took Was a failure.

I don’t want to be strong, I felt my strength In my hardest times.

I am afraid to Think of you, But I still do, Even though, I fear insanity.

I am terrified.